Constant Commentary

We have an exciting new trip on the very distant horizon.  We are all super excited about it!!  And then..... WA WA WAAAAA I start researching our little mini-trip adventures and one of the ones that I am most excited about has a weight limit.  And I am 50 pounds over.  That is a lot of weight to lose.  FORTUNATELY, I have eleven months to do it.  UNFORTUNATELY, based on past experience, I lack confidence that I can do this. I took the weekend to wallow in self-pity.  Then we went for a walk in the city forest, and I realized just how out-of-shape I am, and so then I wallowed in self-pity some more.  Not quite done with the wallowing, but tomorrow I plan to SPRING out of bed and get a good walk in before work.  Putting couch25k on the back-burner for now and am just going to walk walk walk walk walk walk........ 50 pounds to go......

Remember when I said that when coming back from vacation it would be hard to get back "on it."  Holy Shit-- has is ever!?? I'm a mess. I can blame that I just started grad school. I can blame that my work schedule has just changed. I can blame... well... it's winter.... it's this... it's that..... blah blah blah None of those excuses are actual things that have prevented me from eating well.  None of them.  What HAS prevented me from eating well.  I don't want to.  I don't feel like it. I don't want to plan.  I don't want o grocery shop I feel gross.  I feel bloaty and fat and my clothes feel tight.  Lonnie has gained weight too, and because he only gains weight in his belly, it shows quickly and makes him feel gross.  We need to get our shit together.  ASAP. How do you get that driven feeling back once it disappears!!??  I don't even want to grocery shop for the "good healthy foods" because well.... probably because part of me kn...

Today as I slid on my jeans for work...  I was actually planning on probably having to slide them back off again because they were too tight.   NOPE!  If anything,  they were looser!  As planned,  while in Mexico,  I ate and drank everything I wanted to.  Fortunately,  that is a LOT of great fresh Mexican food!  I never really eat junk food in Mexico because it's all just weird stuff.   Even if I am feeling snacky,  and go into a corner store,  I almost always come out empty handed because 1. I don't know what anything is and 2. None of it looks appetizing to me.  My downfall was traveling home.  I am VERY CAREFUL about what I eat around plane trips for fear of a repeat of the puking incident,  but once we got back in Boston ...and ended up stranded there for 2 days (thank you American Airlines for losing the one bag with our car keys in it).  I must admit,  all bets were off....

Luna looks on in the kitchen as the crazy lady takes a yoga selfie I can't believe that I am on day 30 and still going strong!  I guess since it's been a month now, I should do a little run-down of changes that I have or have not noticed. Things that have not changed.... I am still fat.  (I shouldn't say things like that, I know.... positive self talk... blah blah blah....) I still have a LOT of bags of clothes that are waiting for me to be smaller so that I can wear them. I cannot run 3 miles without walking at all. I still do not go to the gym or exercise as much as I would like to I still love Justin Bieber And One Direction. Things that HAVE changed.... I have LESS fat on my body. The button on my jeans is not standing on the ledge threatening to of jump from the pressure it's under. I can wear some of the clothes that I had not been wearing because they didn't fit properply. I can run/walk in 1 minute intervals easily for 15 minutes (and surely more than that, ...

Today is a holiday for the kids, not for me.  So as I am on-call, I just said goodbye to them as they headed off TO THE GYM TOGETHER!! GOOD LORD I DID SOMETHING RIGHT!!! Monday selfie- coffee happened much earlier on the road! The weekend was very blah, but also very YAY!  On Saturday Lonnie was gone all day at a coughcoughgamingconventioncoughcough.  I knew that he would eat "off plan" since he was out all day, so as I drove to the grocery store I gave myself permission to also have a little treat/splurge.  I thought ALL the way there about what I have really missed and really would like and came up with NOTHING.  My old favorite sweet treats like cake... ice cream... candy.... no thanks, the thought of them just made me feel a little sick to my stomach.  (You know... like that feeling you have after eating too many pancakes and then someone offers you a cinnamon bun?)  So no sweets.  Ooooh!  How about chips?  Cheez-its (my lifelone nem...

Another successful day under my soon-to-be-shrinking belt!  Jessi is on board with me and that is so awesome to have everyone in the family ON IT and eating right and exercising!  I haven't struggled much at all yet or been tempted.  Last night I had a little bag of cheez-its and focused on eating ONE AT A TIME as to my former 2-4 at a time, and really just enjoying each one and making my snack last.  It worked like a charm!