Constant Commentary

Last night Lonnie took the dogs out to do their business and when he came in, he brought me a quarter and exclaimed, "I found a quarter in the driveway!!" As you might expect, I looked at him like he was crazy as I opened my hand to accept his gift and said, "Um..... thank you.....?" And then he explained that he always looks for quarters, and whenever he finds them or gets them back as change, he puts them in my car's cup holder because he knows I like to get 75 cent fountain sodas.  But I had locked my car last night, so he couldn't put it in there. I had NO IDEA he has always done this.  Yes... I use the quarters, and a time or two thought for a split second, "Did I put those there?" before my ever-thought-racing brain moved on to the next random thought.  It never occurred to me that I had a quarter-knight-in-shining-armor.  (Quarter Fairy sounded wrong...lol) It really is the little things.

While the view from my window today is still bleak, Spring is definitely knocking on the door! Holy crap, I haven't been a very regular blogger!  Hate that! I am going to take the chicken-shit way out here and blame my blog-slacking on my "WINTER BLUES."  I wouldn't say I have seasonal-affective disorder, but I would say I am about as close to saying that as I can be. Wintertime is tough.  I spend a LOT of time (which also seems to always translate to a lot of money) trying to find ways to cheer myself up and feel like there is reason to jump out of my warm, cozy bed into my frigid apartment every morning.  This years 'cheeruppers' included a personal trainer, a fishtank, talk of another puppy (not happening), lots of indoor building projects, and not one, but TWO trips to Mexico.  ....and quite a few extra work shifts picked up to afford them all ;-) I am very grateful for a partner who is so supportive and more-than-willing to join me in...

When I was fifteen years old, I lived in a car with two guys.  I spent my days sleeping in the backseat and visiting my friends in the high school parking lot rather that going to school.  I was suspended,  and then expelled. I shoplifted a package of Twinkies from the Broadway Shop n' Save because I was hungry.  I was arrested for inciting a riot.  Then I was arrested again because I didn't return two movies and the store charged me with theft.  Then I broke into house of an ex-boyfriend to retrieve said movies (that he had refused to give back to me) and return them.  And... oh yeah, I was also a cutter.   .............................blah blah blah this all led me to want to pursue a career in social work as I feel that I can not only relate to those who are struggling, but I also feel like I am a pretty good example of the fact that one CAN come out on the other side of a bad place. The past few months I had been pondering going to grad scho...

Every morning we had established a ritual of walking from our resort over to starbucks for iced coffee and unlimited internet.  The Starbucks is located in a little plaza that also houses several shops and carts and stands.  That morning, we had decided that instead of our plan to stick around the resort pool and swim-up bar, we wanted to find an adventure.  So before our Starbucks visit, we talked with some guys at one of the stands that had been calling out to us all week to buy tours from him.  All of their tours had already left for the day, but they had a tour that sounded fun the next day to visit some Cenotes and swim and snorkle with sea turtles.  While Lonnie sorted out the details with the guy at the stand, I headed over to Starbucks.   When Lonnie came back, not only had he booked our turtle tour, but he had also met a gentleman that worked for a travel agency in the plaza who had come out to caution Lonnie not to book tours with that...

It all started with a Cinnabon at the Charlotte Airport. I couldn’t resist.  I hadn’t had one in probably 15 years, and the novelty of it got the best of me.  As I ate my ooey, gooey pile of cinnamon, frosting, and barely cooked dough, I offered Lonnie a bite, which he accepted, and then immediately regretted and said, “You are going to regret eating that thing.  That is disgusting.  You are going to be a mess and be whining to me any minute that you don’t feel well.”  I rolled my eyes. After our snack, we headed to the gate to wait for our plane.  Panic ensued as we realized that our phones were still on Mexico time and had our flight not been delayed, we would have missed it.  Even with the delay, we just made it in before they shut the doors.  I think the panic and adrenaline from that was the next nail in my coffin.  Next nail… we sat idling on the tarmac for a loooooong time.  As I sat there feeling the plane rumble and idle,...

As I mentioned before, when I saw the photos of myself on Jessi's graduation day, I was horrified at the weight I had allowed myself to balloon up to.  Even though I knew the numbers on the scale were getting larger, I somehow managed to bury had my head in the sand and ignore it all. But on that day, I vowed to myself that I would NOT look at photos of the day I dropped Jessi off at college and feel the same way.  I vowed I would NEVER look at photos and feel that way again.  I have lost 20 pounds since that day.  I am a huge fan of instant gratification, so I wish I could say it was more, but I'll take it because damnit,.... I HAVE EARNED IT. Lonnie and I are still going strong on our new way of eating.  I can't really call it low-carb, or paleo, because it's really a combo of the two.  Our focus is no breads, pastas, stuff like that.  And no processed foods.  Except diet caffeine-free soda.  Just can't give it up.  Maybe...

Everything I do the past couple days feels like "the last time I...." This is the last time I will buy Jessi Almond milk. This is the last time Jessi will be able to come to yoga with me. To Sean, "Next weekend when you come home from Dad's, it will be just the 3 of us." I realize that none of those things are probably true.  She will be home in the summers, and for breaks, but it will be different.  She's a GROWN UP now.  How did that happen!?  And she's not even 'just a grown-up'.... She is an amazing woman!! Who knows what she wants and just goes out and gets it. Who knows the difference between right and wrong, but also can see the grey. Who is a 'good girl' ....but isn't afraid it be a little bad sometimes! Who is incredibly considerate to the feelings of others. Who is the perfect balance of sassy and sweet.  OK, maybe not really.  Maybe 80% sassy....... Anyhoo... I am going to miss her like crazy.  Last night ...