Constant Commentary

I had my 40th birthday!!  Yeah buddy!!  There have been past birthday 'milestones' that I was just miserable about, but for some reason, this birthday, this birthday we are "supposed" to be miserable about, I am perfectly content with.  Embracing it actually!!  Happy to have learned lots of shit up til now that I can put into use for however much longer I have on this planet :)  (Hopefully at least another 40 years!) And that 'shit I've learned......' Grace, 'letting shit go', forgiveness, 'not having control over anyone but myself' ....well I am practicing it in SPADES lately and it feels awesome to finally feel in control of myself and not like a hot mess ;-) And there is MORE big news!!  Lonnie asked me to marry him last weekend when he took be away to celebrate my birthday and I SAID YES!!  (Shocker... right?  lol)  I new it was coming at some point, since I did help choose my ring,  but yet somehow I was still surprised ...

Whoa.  I saw this on Pinterest this morning and was all.... "DAMNIT... I've MATURED!???  Who wants to be MATURE!!??"  LOL  ....but alas.  It happened and I didn't even know it. Things at work have been a bit on the rough side lately... this past week in particular, and I have shockingly taken it all in stride.  In fact, during the worst of it, I was able to "check myself before I wrecked myself" ;-)  I also spent a lot more time thinking about the fact that other people have their own shit... and not everything is about me... and guess what!?  I CAN'T CONTROL EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE!!!  I have been working on mastering this since the divorce, and honestly.  I think I am there!  I CAN'T control anyone but me.  And that's GREAT because it means that I also am not responsible for every bad thing that happens in the universe ;-) I have decided to ride this maturity wave like a champ.  I turn 40 this year and I am totally...