Day 3 -Winter Zombieland

Winter Zombie
It was a cold and blizzardy day yesterday. Got around 8 inches.... and it snowed too!!

I never did make it to the gym.  Then I got called to do an awake overnight shift at the children's crisis unit.  UGH.  I did not bring any snacks with me as I was in a rush to get out the door, I probably couldn't have eaten anyway, overnight shifts when I have to stay awake all night make me sick to my stomach and get raging headaches.

I DID make a responsible choice when I got home though and had a protein-filled small breakfast before hitting the sack.

As I was only able to sleep til around noon, I skipped the gym again today as I am a bit on the zombie side.  I definitely could have gone.  But I didn't.  I just HATE going out in the cold, trudging through the snow, warming up the car, scraping the car, and then getting back into the freezing car after the gym.  I realize this is a ridiculous excuse.

I DID, however, stick to watching the carbs and didn't eat through the rollercoaster of emotions I have ridden since last evening; exhaustion, frustration, annoyance, anger, boredom, not feeling well, trying to stay awake......

So.... still winning!

I read the most ANNOYING thing on Facebook yesterday that let me doubt myself for a few seconds....

https://www.facebook.com/AnneLamott/posts/776639689132343?fref=nf&pnref=story

If you want to finish it, you can click it.

I have thought about this a lot today, yesterday, a year ago..... really ever since I read those books about emotional eating.  *Click here to read a few of my blogs I wrote while I was focused on this topic.

I completely agree with the basic I idea of that post.  However, if I don't control the shit I am eating by dieting, and making a conscious effort to avoid foods that trigger binges and cravings, I am NOT taking care of myself.  And I want to feel good.  Look good.  Be able to do all the fitnessy, activityish stuff that I love to do.

So there.  Screw you lady who is telling me that I am doing a stupid thing.  Screw. you.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

ISO home for my 50 extra pounds

Image
Excuse time is over.  There is ALWAYS an excuse to not eat right and exercise and let's get real here, NONE of them hold water. I have gained 50 fucking pounds this year.  50.  Fucking. Pounds.  That's a lot.  Like... a way lot.  Cielo's food truck took a Mother's Day shot of Jessi and I the other day and I didn't even want to tag myself in it because I look HORRIBLE!!  It's amazing how sometimes I can look in the mirror and convince myself that I don't..... I went shopping over the weekend because none of my clothes fit and it sucked.  A lot.  Like.... a way lot. I need to look at this is in a different way.  I am not taking care of myself.  I am living in the moment doing whatever I want, whenever I want.  It still feels like a party when Lonnie and I are spending time with each other and party to me = YAHOOOO eat whatever you want.  So I need to learn that happy does not equal party!   I have 5ks coming up.  I have clothes that I would lik
Read more

The small stuff

Image
The kids went off with Rick to the cottage on East Grand Lake that we all used to go to every year.  I am having "feelings."  Hate that shit.... lol!  I am happy with my life now and I wouldn't go back for a million dollars, but sometimes it's the small stuff I miss... like the week of preparing for camp and loading up the car until there wasn't one lick of space left.   Having in-laws to call and talk to and that call me to ask me stuff all the time too.   My air conditioned bedroom ;-) My old running route My sink and faucet.... damn they are the best sink and faucet ever Not having to go upstairs to go to the bathroom The awesome parties that we used to have and that have gone on now without me Anyway... you get the idea.  I mean obviously there is the "big stuff" too... like feeling bad that the kids have to live in two houses now and stuff... but it's really the little stuff that hits me now and then like a ton of bricks.  Or maybe
Read more

RLS and stuff

I had started another blog called "ON IT" to use as weight loss/exercise motivation and to not clog up my regular blog with all health and fitness crap.  But HELLO!??  Health and fitness crap is what interests me!  ....and this is MY BLOG!!!  So I am scrapping that other blog and just doing all that stuff here! RLS update.  After reading my blog about my restless legs , my mom talked to me about my Restless Legs Syndrome, and as a result, I decided to try the Gabapentin.  So I did.  Last week was a rough week, a busy week, and I was an emotional wreck.  For a few days I chalked it up to Lonnie's new job keeping him gone til late every night, and my officially starting my new position. Then it got worse.  And worse.  Until Friday night when I was literally a crying, hysterical, mess of anxiety and grief about... well... nothing and everything.  But really, nothing.   I still was blaming the new schedules as I went to bed, and just thinking that maybe I am just fucki
Read more